what I would do differently...
My mom recently asked me "now that you've seen so many gorgeous ideas what would have you done differently?" Since we set a modest budget of $15,000, there are two lists--one with the same budget, and a one with a dream budget.
[Same budget]
[ONE] I would have chosen comfort over style in the shoe area. I decided to wear 3.25" Grace Bianca heels. They were gorgeous candlelight silk that matched my gown, and they were tall enough so I didn't need to have my gown hemmed, but my feet were killing me.
[TWO] I would have done a mixture of flowers, instead of an all-rose bouquet. The roses smelled great and all my life I thought I wanted to carry roses, but looking back at photos, I think mixed flowers would have been a better choice.
[THREE] Even though we loved our cake centerpieces, looking back, I'm a bit bummed that I didn't do amazing floral centerpieces. I am SO practical sometimes, and it was hard for me to spend all that money.
[FOUR] I would have made a list of photos I wanted. My photographer did an amazing job, but there were a lot of photos that were missed. There are none of just me and my mom, and we didn't do any fun bridal party shots.
[dream budget]
[ONE] I would have hired an amazing videographer. We had my cousin, a film student, do a video for us, but if we would have had an extra $3000+, I would have hired professionals. Our video captured the day, but it does not look like a Hollywood production.
[TWO] Gorgeous linens--I would have gone nuts at BBJ Linen!! The all-white linens were good in our room--white table cloth, white napkins, white chair covers with white sashes, but I would have loved champagne, chocolate and ivory instead.
[THREE] I would have added a Photobooth. I didn't even know this place existed when I was planning a year ago and our guests would have had a blast!
[FOUR] Our honeymoon to Bermuda was a blast, but it would have been amazing to spend 4 times the money and go to The Maldives or somewhere really exotic! A girl can dream, right?
Married ladies--what would you have done differently?
13 lovely comment(s):
Your list is super close to mine. We only had a 10,000 budget so I know how you feel. We would have loved to have Coastline Videograph our wedding. I love them. I also would have liked more elaborate floral centerpieces and had flowers and candles everywhere (our venue wasn't keen on candels). I would have picked a site with higher celings.
We did have a "must take" list - but even still a few were forgotten or missed due to time constraints. No biggie :)
And, of course, a dream honeymoon to Fiji or Greece would have been oh so nice...
1.Photographer. I wish we would have hired someone who looked at it "magazine" style...because it was SO there.
2. Florist. I went with a florist who EVERYONE recommended. Problem was they were so booked they didn't pay any attention to the details I dreamed of. I was just another wedding to them.
3. I would have hired a Coordinator. I was determined I could do it myself... and I did. But in retrospect, I was so tired the morning of the wedding and so preoccupied with the details of the set up (oh yes, I was there with my glass of champagne before ANY of my vendors) I feel I missed being a bride. i never traded my "planner" hat in for the veil.
I recently asked my husband, "Can we have another wedding?" His answer..."Only if we hire a coordinator." lol, another story to tell potential clients.
Great post!
I really wouldn't change much about our wedding.
There were so many details and great things about it and I was so happy with how it all turned out!
There are a few things I would have added:
1. I wish we had chosen to use a photbooth, it is such a neat idea and I would love to look back at those pictures :)
2. I would have had you there to coordinate everything!
I often think about this when I'm photographing weddings. What a fun post!
I wish we would have had a bigger photography budget and also a budget for a videographer. Any videographer would have been great but I would love to be able to afford Coastline. They do amazing work!
And while I did love my dress, I have to admit that I wished I had looked longer and found one that was a little more unique...a little more 'me'.
Other than that though, our day was amazing and almost three years later still love thinking about it.
I wish only that we had figured out that our Sunday Brunch wedding was going to be a problem for the....minister. Why this timing wasn't a red flag for the minister...we'll never know.
But, after many calls and delaying the wedding nearly 90 minutes, all went off without another hitch!
I chose a lacy suit style dress and a very simple low key event which suited both of us just perfectly. I wouldn't change a thing...even the minister issue gave us great memories that are funny only in retrospect!
Sally
Good question!
Same budget: would have done a different bridal bouquet. Like you, would have done mixed flowers (white/green hydrangea in there somewhere. Would have gotten a different dress (spent under my budget by half and am not sure why).
Dream budget: linens, pin spot lighting at the reception, and a band instead of a DJ.
I love this idea! My husband and I always re-hash our wedding. We eloped and surprised everyone including our parents. I don't know if I would do that again. I think we hurt a few peoples feeling by not including them. But it was so relaxing and a very private special time for the two of us. I would have a beautiful bouquet (I didn't have anything). We had a big reception. I loved that we hired a live band but they had the worst timing for smoke breaks! I also totally regret not having a PHOTO BOOTH at our reception. Our wedding announcement and invite was us holding sign in a photo booth that said Finally, We did it! (kissing). People loved getting it in the mail since no one had a clue we had eloped. The PHOTO BOOTH would have been perfect.
I wanted a Mexican Fiesta theme. I did little hints of it with the centerpieces, decorations and a wedding piñata instead of cake. That was awesome, Jon and I took turns smashing it. But I really wish I would have had authentic Mexican food and a live Mariachi band. One last "I wish"... we rented a community center and I really wish I would have hired someone else to clean it the next day. Jon and I were up early after the party cleaning the hall (stupid). We should have taken a couple days off. We should have been relaxing at a pretty hotel somewhere. So there are my-"if I could do it agains"
-Heather
I love this post because after shooting tons of weddings, this is something I think of often. I also had about a 10,000 budget and was so consumed with sticking with it! I won't give you the list, because it's so long but the two things I would have changed are:
The dress: I did love my dress...but partly because of the price. I wish now I would have just bought the dress of my dreams!
Photography: I made the mistake of hiring a friend who was a photographer, but not a professional wedding photographer. There's such a BIG difference!!! To anyone reading this...hire a professional wedding photographer...that day can only be captured ONCE!
This is great because I am in the process of planning a wedding!! Thanks for all of the helpful hints!!
Aletha,
This is an excellent post. Check out my blog today.
I WOULD HAVE: Actually read the contract on my location (vacation house rental) - We got word the night before the wedding at 11pm that we could not have 120 guests at the house the next day for the wedding. PANIC! So we went into super fix it mode and moved all the tables, chairs, flowers… to my bridesmaid’s backyard in Spring Lake. We worked all night but it turned out beautiful. I really earned my honeymoon.
thanks for your comment on my blog! i love your blog and just passed it along to a couple of my friends who are engaged. i ended up posting a list of things i did "right," too. it's here: http://peacoat.typepad.com/peacoat/2008/09/929-ten-things-i-did-absolutely-right.html
Aletha, it is so wonderful to see you in your element. I remember that shortly after I met you, you told me your dream job was to be a wedding planner. Looks like you are a wild success!
We had a $15,000 budget, which included our rings and honeymoon. Since I didn't get married until I was 35, I had plenty of time to think about what I wanted to do for my wedding, which worked out great because we were only engaged for 4 months! :-) Niels jokes that all we had to do was plug in his name on the program.
What I loved:
* our wedding was very "us." I loved how we incorporated international touches into our wedding, which included guests from five countries. Luggage tags for seating assignments, each table had a theme with foods from the locale, etc.
* I LOVE my ring, it has an Eiffel tower on one side (where we got engaged) and a Dutch tulip on the other (b/c DH is Dutch). LOVE LOVE LOVE it.
* I love that we stayed on budget so we didn't start our marriage in debt. Planning the details was a great exercise in communication and compromise. (Flowers were very important to my Dutch relatives, not so much to me).
* Splurging on our honeymoon. We spent a week at an all-inclusive in Curacao, a Dutch island near Aruba. After all the stress of planning, it was fabulous to have that week all to ourselves without having to worry about a thing.
What I would change:
* Hire a videographer, even if I had to cut/trim something else. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. I will always regret this.
* I would not get married outside in July. We were told the average temperature in our location was 70. It was 92. We are beyond "glowing" in our pictures!
* I would also have a list of pictures taken, and assign someone other than the photographer to make sure they are taken. We had a list, but in the heat, we were rushed. We don't have one "classic" photo of the two of us. Lots of great ones, but not that great one of the two of us for our mantel.
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